This Must Be a Dream

flower

A Poem of Lament, dedicated to my pawpaw who died in 2008 with Alzheimer’s Disease.

“May your dreams be good and filled with love.” – Your grandson

Walking into the room I see and know him,
He sees me but wonders who I am.
His memory’s sight is shattered and dim,
A tearing anguish fills my heart.
How precious it is to be remembered,
Until a disease slates a love to be dismembered.

My core is cut to shreds,
Anger and sorrow breaks my heart’s threads.
An emotional limp is now mine to bear,
“My God, where is your divine care?”
I then scream,
“This must be a dream!”

“God it was too soon!”
“Now my inner world is broken and out of tune,”
“Where is justice?! WHERE IS YOUR LOVE?!”
“Where is my God of heaven above?”
“How about this life? How about these broken shards?”
“Where are your comforting regards?!”
“Each ashes to ashes,”
“My inner self crashes.”

“God you saw and knew him,”
“You created him.”
“From his childhood to his death,”
“You kept him.”
“You – who are love,”
“The first love,”
“Loved him.”
“Thank you for the time that you gave me to be with him,”
“Thank you for granting me memories of him.”
“Did you not mutually sorrow for him?”
“Yes – I imagine a good Father would also cry over him.”


© M. Keith Sartin, Jr.

photo credit: laurent fiol Perce-neige (12) via photopin (license)

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